UIUC. what a place, i've never seen so many pretty girls concentrated in 10 square mile radius before. Maybe it's something about the big boobs here. ( lol ) anyway not like i really care... my schedule is packed and i'm out here to experience the american way.

Some stuff happened and as i sat in the lecture hall contemplating my fate/life, i realise if i stayed back home maybe it'll all have been the same. ( in the smaller sense of the word) everything here is upsized so in a campus of 50,000 students everything runs self sufficiently, a system which i approve of greatly.

I think about sitting in a lecture in SMU, would it have been the same? about the people i already know there. the kind of life i'd experience. maybe. . . . my heart's heavy. Uncertainties; definitions, boundaries, are we to live by these? Looks like when they say a whole new life it's really that huh? didn't know a single soul and had to make friends all over again.

The people i care for back home... are just ... back home. What can i do when i'm 10,000 miles away.. . . .. ?